When you are diagnosed with a chronic illness, so many things change. Your body, lifestyle, food, diet, medications, relationships, routine, etc. All of this change can be overwhelming and you may not feel like yourself. When I was diagnosed with myasthenia gravis I had to grieve the loss of my old self and discover new things I loved about myself. Today, I am more than content and genuinely happy with the woman I have become, even living with MG.
There are many things we can hate about chronic illness, but we must remember to love ourselves after our diagnosis. Here are a few tips on how to love yourself again after receiving a diagnosis like myasthenia gravis:
Learn something new or become skilled in something that interests you.
Chronic illness can sometimes take away the things we were once involved in. Many of the extracurricular activities I participated in were no longer an option for me. I was unable to not only perform physically (i.e. volleyball/dancing), but my energy was now devoted to things of higher priority such as school, relationships, and moreover, my health. What we do or partake in doesn’t define us, but it promotes self-confidence. Whenever I find myself on the couch bulldozed by fatigue, I watch makeup tutorials or explore clothing websites for a friend/family member who needs help picking out an outfit for a specific event. These little tasks may seem like trivial “skills” to some but for me, they have provided a healthy outlet that allows me to help others and be an “expert” in something that brings me joy.
Own your image.
Sometimes our illnesses alter our appearances; I know I have struggled from time to time accepting the changes my body goes through. With myasthenia gravis, we can have droopy eyelids, asymmetric smiles, weight gain due to prednisone, etc. These things can drastically impact our body image and self-esteem. I’m sure many think this is the last thing we should be thinking about but as patients, we are very much aware of how we are perceived or viewed because we live with chronic illness. When you don’t feel comfortable in your own skin, maybe try buying yourself a pretty scarf, a new pair of shoes, a fashionable accessory, a skincare product, or just something that makes you feel beautiful. Making peace with yourself knowing your body may change is a difficult task, but when you do, you can focus on your overall health and wellbeing in a healthy manner.
Vow to love yourself the way you love others.
You know the saying, “treat others as you wish to be treated?” This is an important rule, but I find that this principle works even better when stated as, “treat yourself the way you treat others.” Assuming that you treat people with respect and dignity, you must respect and value yourself first. Think about the people you love: how you show them love and how you give them love. Implement those acts of love into your own life. It’s similar to when you are on an airplane and the oxygen masks drop from above. The first thing they tell you is to put your mask on before you assist others. Take it from someone who doesn’t always put theirs on first: put your mask on first. Otherwise, you get burned out.
Express your emotions, even the negative ones.
Many people have a hard time expressing how they feel. Learning how to articulate your emotions will help you become more in tune with what your mind, body, and spirit need. Sure, being aware of your thoughts and feelings is healthy, but learning how to manage them is even healthier. People with chronic illness tend to bottle up their feelings because they don’t want to be a “burden” to others. Know that it’s okay to feel happy, to have fun, and it is also okay to feel sad and exhausted. Our moods will vary greatly, even throughout the day, but remember that recognizing them and doing something about them will allow you to become more self-aware and be comfortable in that space.
This February, learn how to love yourself again. Chronic illness can make us feel heartbroken at times, but remember, there’s always a band-aid for that.
The following blog post was written by Meridith O'Connor, St. Louis Program Coordinator for the Myasthenia Gravis Association.